Positive or Negative

I was inspired to write this cause i spoke with a friend about weather people should react positively about problems or negatively. I actually overheard some one talking about a problem with a pier. lets just say Jane and Kim. Well Kim is claiming that Jane is racist but in the midst of Kim's conversation about Jane she proceeded to call her a "Racist white bitch" and other profane insults. How in the world can you accuse some one of being racist and then say that and feel alright about yourself. Why does she have the right to accuse some one of being racist when she is obviously racist herself. Some one once told me that the reason people accuse one another of stealing is because they themselves are thieves. I am not accusing any one here just stating what I see. My friend raised the question of should we respond to racism negativly? Or should we respond positive and try and help them to change? What would MLK Jr. say?? I say take the positive approach, why not confront the pier and tell her what she is doing cause she may not know that she is being racist. Why not confront her and then have an educated and mature conversation about it instead of talking bad about her and making threats on her. I dont know but I think both Jane and Kim are wrong in this situation. should we respond positive or negative?